ReFocus

Sylvia Gunter has once again written a wonderful devotion:

Listen to Zephaniah 3:17. “The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” Listen again from the Amplified Bible. “The Lord Your God is in the midst of you, a mighty One, a Savior who saves! He will rejoice over you with joy. In his love he will rest in silent satisfaction. He will exult over you with singing.”

Receive your Father’s smile today. All the affectionate imagery you can muster is only a dim picture of how he feels about you. You have not yet heard or seen or known the majesty of all his great love. You have longed and ached for a father’s embrace, and you have a Father whose heart longs for you. Be blessed as you receive his embrace. Look into his eyes to see him and yourself reflected there. He loves you in the way you were created to be loved. He loves you with his love as strong as death. He has come to overwhelm you with his love. He will pour out over your life everything you need. He has saved the best till now.

One thing is necessary: live at his feet and rest in his presence. Let his peace permeate your mind. Let his love calm your heart. As your Abba delights in his Beloved Son in whom he is well pleased, he delights in you in the same way, because he is in you and you are in him. The prayer of Jesus was “Father, let them know deeply that as you love me, so you love them, they in me and I in you” (John 17:21,26 paraphrased). He loves you beyond anything you deserve or can earn.

Let his love be the foundation of your life, and you will be filled again and again in all the promises he has spoken to you. He wants you to know that you are beloved in the Beloved Son and complete in the finished work of the cross, where he dealt with all sin, wounds, words, and other hurtful things that separate you from his love. God delights in you. There’s power in that little phrase. “I am the one God likes.” We need to live in this truth: “God LIKES me” today, every day, every moment. That doesn’t mean we do everything right, but when we do something wrong, we come to a throne of grace and find mercy to help us in our need. Be blessed as you receive mercy and grace there, that empowering presence of the Spirit to believe the truth and live in it. Allow God to remove all that causes offense.

Coach your soul to let go of the past, the pain, the problems. Turn your back on them as you face your Father. Be blessed with joy and a different peace and a greater rest than you have ever known. Be blessed with refreshing and renewal in his presence, as you pursue all that he has created you for.

Spirit, be blessed in your Father’s house where there’s a party in your honor, to celebrate you, just as in Luke 15. He is an extravagant Father. Be blessed as he rejoices over you with great gladness. Be blessed in the wonderful sound of the Lord himself exulting over you in happy song.

Recently I came across this list prepared by Jim Husband.

Monday: Pray for your pastor’s family:
• God’s peace and protection
• A growing love relationship between pastor and spouse
• A commitment to quality and quantity time together
Tuesday: Pray for wisdom for your pastor.
• The mind of Christ
• Godly decision-making
• Understanding of biblical truth
Wednesday: Pray for the ministry focus of your pastor.
• Clear vision
• Commitment to biblical priorities
• Remain true to his or her God-given gifts and strengths

Thursday: Pray for the health of your pastor.
• Protection of body and mind
• An extra portion of stamina and strength
• Commitment to stress-releasing activity

Friday: Pray for spiritual growth of your pastor.
• A heart for God and the lost
• Fresh biblical insights
• Personal devotions not related to sermon preparation

Saturday: Pray for the purity of your pastor.
• Pure motives
• Pure thought-life and faithfulness to spouse
• Pure commitment to complete integrity

Sunday: Pray for God’s anointing on your pastor.
• Strength in leadership
• Passion in preaching
• Fruit and joy in ministry

1. Honor Thy Body
Stayng fit through regular exercise and a healthy diet is smart for anyone, but especially for pastors who can wind up spending much of their time in sedentary, mentally intensive work. St. Bendict was no fool: His rule mandates that part of each monk’s day be given over to manual labor, and that’s still a good idea for clergy.

2. Thou Shalt Take a Break
Even God rested on the seventh day. Clergy should do at least that and might try to take one weekend off per month. Regular vacations are a must, but an extended saatical every few years is an even better idea.

3. Thou Shalt Be a Team Player
The “Messiah complex” is one of the biggest pitfalls. Even clergy who are the most humble of servants can wind up convinced they must inject their holiness into every single meeting and event. You are not as necessary as you think you are. Trust others, and deligate. You can’t fix everything.

4. Thou Shalt Get a Life
Developing a social circle outside of the congregation is critical. Clergy tend to root their lives in the congregation, ut that can leave them stranded when they need to lean on someone. Finding support groups, other clergy friends, and even clergy in other denominations are popular options.

5. Thou Shalt Not Delay
When the going gets tough, the smart ones get help. Clergy often have a visceral distaste for psychotherapy – for themselves, not necessarily for others – but religion and psychiatry have found enough common ground in recent years that clergy can get on the couch without checking their faith at the door.

. . . And five things congregants can do to help

6. Honor Thy Father
Pastors can be parents, too. Allow time to be with their families. Recognize that more families have two working parents, and that means clerlgy families, too. The old-time “pastor’s wive” – or husband – may not be around to serve tea and pick up the slack.

7. Thou Shalt Not Play Politics
It’s amazing how nasty “religious” folk can be toward their own pastor. Congregations can be breeding grounds for cliques, at least one of which usually targets the spiritual leader. Don’t pile on, and do what you can to discourage such behavior.

8. Thou Shalt Give Thanks
It’s also amazing how few worshippers even bother to say “Thanks” to the pastor. Everyone has a complaint about something – the music wasn’t good, he flowers weren’t right, and most of all, things were always better in the old days. The past is past. This is today. Find something nice to say.

9. Honor His/Her Time Off
Better yet, start an effort to make sure the pastor takes a vacation or schedules a sabbatical. There are a growing number of programs that provide grants to help congregations hire a temporary fill-in. Or why not a fund-raisser to send the pastor (and spouse?) on a lenghty pilgrimage of study and relaxation?

10. Thou Shalt Pray
This goes for both congregants and their clergy. Remember, a central function of religion is to nurture the soul, and congregants who make an effort to live up to the tenets of their faith will probably make their pastors happier. And clergy who lose sight of their vocation and their spiritual center are courting trouble.

(From Unknown Source)

What is the job description of a ‘waiter or waitress’?  The federal government gives the following definition:  “A waiter is responsible for coordinating the entire station and communicating with front- and back-of-the-house personnel to provide a dining experience that meets or exceeds guest expectations. He will process guest orders to ensure that all items are prepared properly and on a timely basis. He may carve meats, de-bone fish and fowl, prepare flaming dishes and desserts at tableside and present, open, and pour wine when serving guests. He observes diners to ensure that guests are satisfied with the food and service, and he responds to additional requests and determines when the meal has been completed. He totals bills and accepts payment or refers guests to cashier. He may assist bus person with stocking, removing, and resetting dishes and silverware between courses and cleaning and resetting vacated tables.”

Schonwalder.org says, “A waiter should be able to handle any task of a waiter’s complex and demanding job. A waiter should be experienced in seating, greeting, cocktail preparation and service, wine serving and sales.  If he knows something about accounting, the better for him. A waiter has to be able to explain the menu!  He has to be able to write fast and legible. He has to know how to serve any and all the guests’ orders! A good waiter is expected to handle himself in any situation, never to get angry with a guest and never to start a fight with coworkers. A waiter should be well groomed and able to stand long hours on his feet.”

It is a matter of choice for any waiter to be:

• a) just an order taker and plate carrier or
• b) a professional waiter well respected by the customers.

The customer, the patron, the guest – whatever you call him - is always right.

God is the diner…God is the guest…God is the patron…God is the customer…and, of course, He is always right. 

God dines on the fellowship of His children. This is His favorite meal.  God devours this fellowship and intimacy with His children.

You and I are the ‘wait-ers or wait-resses’.

It is our job to satisfy the needs and desires of our one client for the day or evening.  We are to turn down every other table for we have one diner, one guest.  It is God.  How rude to leave our one table and go serve another!  For now, we have one table.  Later, you can wait on the ‘table of work’, and the ‘table of sports’, and the ‘table of finances’.  But for right now…just one table…God’s table.  You and I are His ‘wait-er’ and we are to ‘wait’ on Him.

I can decide to do the bare minimum and just take God’s order and carry His plate.  Or – I can decide that I am going to make this the greatest dining experience that I can offer!  No need, no desire will go unmet!  I will anticipate His every desire and be ready to respond at one simple glance of His eye!  I will ’serve’ Him glory and honor and praise.  I will delight in my work, my path in life,  and my responsibility as inner joy shows forth.  I have no way of knowing how long this dining experience will last.  I really don’t care; I am just enjoying the process.

At some point in time, if I have done my job correctly, my Guest will turn and give me a look of satisfaction that says, “Well done!”  The dining experience is over for now. In the process, I have learned areas that I can improve.  In fact, I can’t wait for the next dining experience with my one Guest…God Himself!

By the way…there is a perk to the job!

The prophet Isaiah gives us a great word in Isaiah 64:4, “…God works…God acts…God moves…on the behalf of those who ‘wait’ for him!” 

Wow!

Have a great week ‘wait-ing’ on your one Guest’s table!

Billy and Sheilah Daws

Everyone should have a Personal Calling Statement.  It serves as your life map so that you know where you are going.

Learn to Recognize the Six Warning Signs of Burnout by Mike Gillespie

I’ve logged 18 years as a youth minister—18 years learning to outsmart a ministry nemesis that’s claimed many of my friends. That enemy is burnout. Two decades ago, I scoffed at the possibility; now I don’t. That’s because I’ve paid a high price for ignoring the warning signs of burnout in my ministry. As you read my story, take a moment to evaluate your ministry. Remember, if you think you’re safe from burnout, you’re probably its next victim.

Warning Sign #1: THE SUPERMAN SYNDROME

Early in my ministry, I was sure hard work was all I needed for success. I felt confident because I already had a good work ethic. Because of my naiveté, I didn’t realize the church will let you work as many hours as you want. There’s always something more to do. A 45-hour week quickly stretched to 50, then to 60, then … I thought I could be everything to everybody.

I was particularly vulnerable at youth council planning sessions. We scheduled retreats, lock-ins, and trips with little recognition on my part of what it’d take to pull them off. The kids loved that about me, so I succumbed. My favorite refrain: “Sure, we can do that.” One summer, I committed to participate in five group trips and lead two week-long children’s camps. “Sure, I can get it done.” BUNK!

I’m learning to work smarter, not longer.

ASK YOURSELF: Am I obsessed with getting it all done? Is hard work a sign of successful ministry to me?

_____YES _____NO _____SOMETIMES

Warning Sign #2: THE FATIGUE FACTOR

How many times in the last six months has a church member said, “You look tired.” Hey, there’s no hiding it. All those all-nighters, retreats, program planning meetings, and visitation trips add up. It surfaces in your posture, your eyes, your energy, and your enthusiasm. It roars out at people you work with in the form of irritability, sarcasm, and cynicism.

I’ve leaned to appreciate people who tell me when I look tired. I take it as grace. I get some rest, lighten my calendar, and recommit to my exercise routine. I understand that I’m no good to anyone when I’m tired. Excuses such as “That’s what ministry is all about” are simply dumb. Recently a youth group member bluntly told me, “Hey, you look tired. Get some rest.” I did. It helped. I’m psyched again.

ASK YOURSELF: Do people notice that I’m tired a lot? Have I looked in the mirror lately and moaned, “I’m tired”?

_____YES _____NO _____SOMETIMES

Warning Sign #3: MISHANDLING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

All of us work with difficult people. Every church and every denomination has them. Sometimes I think God has “overblessed” me with them.

Difficult people demand a lot of attention. They’re high-maintenance people. It takes patience and energy to respond well when they come at you with another passionate agenda. How you deal with them can indicate impending burnout.

I recall an intense father who had demanding views and a biting, sarcastic attitude. I worked with his two daughters. I monitored how I reacted to him. Sometimes I was highly effective and could work through his criticisms positively. Other times I was poisoned by his attacks, and lingering bitterness got the best of me.

What did I discover? It all had to do with ministry energy. When I was in “martyr” mode, I was much less effective with him. When I was energized, I never took his stuff personally.

ASK YOURSELF: Do difficult people often get the best of me? Do confrontations linger and absorb me emotionally?

_____YES _____NO _____SOMETIMES

Warning Sign #4: SPIRITUAL LETHARGY

When we balance our emotional, spiritual, and physical needs, we set in place a foundation for more effective ministry. Experience has taught me that spiritual needs are easy to neglect. That’s why I started taking a yearly hiking vacation in the Colorado Rockies. God has worked on me powerfully on those back-country trails.

As youth leaders, we’re always praying for kids, preparing Bible studies, preaching, and so on. And we expect we’ll find nourishment by spiritual osmosis. That just isn’t true.

To meet my spiritual needs, I must pursue prayer, reading, and quiet time apart from my ministry. If I don’t, my kids know. How? I lead Bible studies like a dictator instead of with them. Group prayer times are legalistic and boring. And I’m pharisaical—I mean I go through the religious motions while neglecting the Holy Spirit’s power.

ASK YOURSELF: Do I tend to overlook my own spiritual nurture? Am I feeding myself so little spiritual food that I’m unable to nurture others through my ministry?

_____YES _____NO _____SOMETIMES

Warning Sign #5: AVOIDING PERSONAL GROWTH

If we don’t pursue opportunities for professional growth, we grow stale. And when burnout is lurking, we lose interest in upgrading our skills.

Professional growth is important to me for two reasons: (1) I value professional relationships with ministry colleagues. When I plan activities or brainstorm ideas with friends, or when I join support groups, I stay fresh. (2) I appreciate good training opportunities. I use my continuing education allowance to upgrade my skills. I particularly like events that teach me new strategies, not just clarify what I already know.

I’ve not always put an emphasis on professional growth. I realize those were times when the burnout bug was like a tick trying to burrow in. Don’t neglect opportunities for professional growth. If you do, that’s a burnout warning sign. (Or worse, you think you know it all already!)

ASK YOURSELF: Do I see professional growth as just another impossible expectation that must be sacrificed for “the important stuff”?

_____YES _____NO _____SOMETIMES

Warning Sign #6: NEGLECTING PERSONAL NEEDS

Have you learned that ministry needs always take priority over personal needs? Then you’re in for troubled times.

I know you could use “take up your cross and follow me” as debate ammunition. But I also know that, at times, I’ve neglected myself, my family, and my friends. And I believe that’s a sin. What a joke—we punish the people we love most to do God’s work. That’s stupid theology.

If you make ministry your mistress, you’ll fizzle quickly. I’m grateful I learned before it was too late that God’s hopes for my ministry aren’t the same as my own expectations. But I’ve paid dearly for neglecting myself, my family and friends.

ASK YOURSELF: Do I neglect my needs because of ministry demands? Do I neglect my family or friends because the church needs me?

_____YES _____NO _____SOMETIMES

Mike Gillespie is a veteran youth minister who’s grappled with burnout throughout his career. He lives in Kansas. This article first appeared in the July/August 1996 issue of Group Magazine.

Preventing Burn-Out

Learn to off load emotionally.

Learn to say ‘No’

Be alert to desperate feelings and understand their implications

Eat a regular and balanced diet

Make time for meaningful relationships and fellowship

Exercise regularly

Maintain a devotional life

Get sufficient sleep to provide rest for the body

Maintain a regular sabbath rest.